Erised's Desire
by Gerri
Summary: Draco discovers the Mirror of Erised...and also a few things about talking mirrors that no one else seems to realise.


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Disclaimer: Very simply, anything that you recognize from the books isn't mine. Pity though, because if I owned Draco Malfoy, he wouldn't be playing second fiddle to Potter all the time. :)

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A/N: My first Harry Potter fic. Easy on the criticism, please. :)

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Erised's Desire

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'I really shouldn't be walking around.'

Well, he shouldn't, after all. If he's found, they'll take points off his house.

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'Wouldn't want that, would we?' he allows himself a silly grin.

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'Couldn't sleep, anyway…'

He turns left.

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'Interesting.'

He's never been to this part of the school before.

He doesn't know where he's going…not that he cares.

He just needs to walk around, that's all.

He walks straight for a while, and then makes another left turn.

A door.

Locked.

He draws his wand lazily.

"Alohomora."

A small rattling sound…and the door stands ajar.

He enters; closes the door behind him. Takes a step forward, and a torch bracket on the wall blazes into life.

He stops, startled, but only for a brief second.

He sees something shining in the darkness before him.

A few more steps forward.

A few more torch brackets burst into flame.

And the shiny thing is-

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'A mirror.'

A very large mirror.

He looks around him.

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'Why would they keep a mirror in a dungeon?'

He moves towards the mirror, intrigued, upon finding it here, at its size, and at the engraving above it.

He sees himself in the mirror.

And then more things…more people start to appear.

He whirls around.

Nothing behind him.

But there are so many people around his image in the mirror.

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'Hello.'

He takes a few steps back, alarmed at the voice.

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'Oh. The mirror talks. Of course.'

"Hi."

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'What brings you here?'

"Nothing. I was just…wandering around."

Silence.

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'It is so quiet down here.'

He looks around again.

"I guess. It's the dungeon after all."

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'So lonely too, young Draco.'

"How did you know my name?"

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'I just do.'

Silence.

"Do you have a name?"

Pause.

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'Yes.'

"Well, what is it?"

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'The one who created me…he called me Erised.'

"That's a strange name."

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'I assure you, "Draco" is by no means a popular name.'

He stares at his image in the mirror. It sounded almost as if the mirror was _laughing_.

Silence.

"You said that you were lonely?"

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'Yes.'

"Why were you put in the dungeon, anyway?"

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'Because I am the downfall of every living person.'

He frowns.

"I don't understand."

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'Everyone that I try to befriend…ends up in the throes of madness. They hid me here…so it would never happen again.'

"What happened to them?"

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'I dare not say.'

"Why not?"

Pause.

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'You might leave me if you knew. Leave me all alone again.'

Silence.

"I won't," he whispers suddenly.

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'You might. Don't be so sure of yourself.'

"I won't," he repeats, slightly more forcibly. "I know what it's like to be alone, Erised. I won't leave you alone."

Pause.

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'I was made to show what one desires…I was made to reveal a person's most desperate dreams…so that they would know exactly what they wanted…so that they could plan their paths to attain their dreams.

'But it started going wrong so long ago, Draco…

'When people became content just to gaze into the glass and watch their dreams play out before their eyes…

'It was so much easier to watch and keep hoping that the scene before their eyes would materialise and become reality.'

And he suddenly understands what he is seeing in the mirror.

"You mean…all this that I'm seeing…it's everything that I want?"

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'Yes.'

There it is again. It sounds like Erised is laughing.

He approaches. His fingers touch the glass.

"I…never knew that I wanted so many things."

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'Everyone is the same. They all want so much. But in the end, there is always one thing that they desire far more above all the rest.'

"I suppose that makes sense."

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'Do you see it, Draco?'

"See what?"

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'The one thing that you want more than anything else.'

He looks at the mirror.

"How do I tell? There're so many things in there-"

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'Look hard, Draco.'

He stares at the images in the mirror; his is the only clear one; the rest all drift randomly in and out of focus.

He sits down as he continues to watch the mirror. The dungeon floor is cold.

He doesn't notice, though.

Another image drifts into focus.

He laughs softly.

It's the Golden Snitch.

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'I'd love to be the best Seeker around…better than even Potter.'

Then the Snitch blurs out of sight.

Another image.

His father.

He smiles.

He loves his father.

Not that the man knows that.

Not that Draco would ever tell him, either.

The image of his father sits down beside his image in the mirror.

And then-

His father puts an arm around his shoulders.

He stares at his reflection, who simply looks into his "father's" face and smiles.

His father's image smiles back at his reflection.

And the two images of father and son simply sit there, smiling, gazing at Draco.

And all the other images start to fade.

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'Do you see it, Draco?'

"The thing that I want more than anything else?"

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'Yes.'

A pause.

"I think…I do."

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'I only show you a representation of what you want. Do you know what the image means? Do you know exactly what it is you want?'

"I want…"

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'Do you know-?'

"I want my father to love me."

Silence.

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'Then I have served my purpose.'

The image begins to blur.

"No!"

He suddenly jumps to his feet and the blurry image freezes.

"No…no…Erised, leave it…let me…let me look at it for a little while. Please?"

The image wavers.

Almost as if Erised is wavering…deciding.

"Erised, please?"

Silence.

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'Only for a while. You must not…look at it for too long.'

Draco smiles and sits down again as the image comes back into focus.

Father and son sit there before him…smiling…

And all he can think about is…

How happy they look.

***

He comes back the next night.

And they talk about so much…

About Draco's life, all thirteen years of it…

And about the long, long life and memories of the mirror named Erised.

And while they talk, Draco watches the images in the mirror.

The images are different now.

This time, he's running, and his father is chasing him.

They're running across…what looks like a meadow.

And his father catches him…and tickles him while they roll around in the grass, and he is squirming, laughing.

And Draco smiles again.

And thinks about how happy they look.

***

At some time past midnight, he returns.

Erised doesn't bother concealing her joy.

She has found a new friend.

One who promised that he wouldn't leave her, and he's keeping his promise.

And then Draco tells her that she's the best friend that he's ever had.

If she had a heart, it would be soaring.

She's so happy to hear that.

And Draco's happy too.

But that's because he can see his father in the mirror.

Kissing him goodnight.

***

The door to the dungeon opens.

And she knows that it's Draco.

"Hey," he throws out light-heartedly as he settles on the floor before her.

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'Hello, Draco.' She pauses. **'Are you sure you're getting enough sleep with all these nightly visits?'**

"Just enough." He grins. "I think Snape might be noticing though. Almost dozed off in Potions today. He'll have my head-…then again, he might have _all of me_ in little bits instead, if I force him to take points from Slytherin."

She smiles to herself. Draco has a strange sense of humour…a little twisted and dark, but…it's humour nonetheless. And he does make her happy. And he is a good friend.

"Erised, y'know…I was wondering today…in Charms…why can't someone find a way to make a Cheering Charm permanent?"

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'I don't understand.'

Draco sighs and leans against the glass.

"Why can't…someone make a Cheering Charm permanent…so that…we could all be happy…"

Silence.

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'Well, if that happened, you wouldn't know what sadness is, would you? Without sadness…how exactly would you define happiness?'

"I don't want to _define_ happiness, I want to _be_ happy."

Erised is silent. And Draco watches his father, playing with an image of his son, in the glass, thinking about how happy he would be…

If that were him in the glass.

***

A week has passed now.

And she begins to worry.

Draco looks more and more tired each night that she sees him.

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'You need more sleep,' she tells him.

"I'll be fine."

Silence.

"Erised?"

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'Yes?'

"I…I've never asked any favours of you before, have I?"

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'Just once. When we first met and you asked me to hold the image of you and your father, for you to look at.'

Silence.

"Erised, you're magical, aren't you?"

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'Of course.' Her voice carries an amused tone.

"I need another favour…please?"

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'What is it?'

But now she begins to worry more.

The tone that Draco is using is not one that she is used to hearing.

His fingers run across the glass.

"Please…can you…my father, this image in the mirror…can you make him real?"

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'Your father _is_ a real person, Draco.' She attempts to sound bemused, but she knows what he means. And she cannot give it to him.

"No, I mean…this image…make the _image_ real!"

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'I can't,' she answers immediately.

"Why not?!" he suddenly screams. "You're made of powerful magic, I know it! I read that in that book the other day! Why can't you make the image _real_?!"

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'I can't.'

"You can!! You _must_ be able to! _Why won't you?!_"

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'Because I _can't_, Draco.'

If she had a heart, it would be breaking. It is unavoidable.

Everyone that she tries to befriend…she drives mad.

And it has happened to the one whose company she loved most…

She did it to Draco too.

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'I'm sorry, Draco.'

She is sorry…for not being able to grant his desperate wish, and for driving him to this state, and for so many other things that would take too much time to say…

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"You're lying!!"

Erised says nothing.

Draco stares at the mirror.

He sees himself hugging his father, that blond boy in the mirror throws his arms around his father, and buries his face in the front of his father's cloak…

And then, the boy turns his head to the side to look at him.

And he smiles at Draco.

Draco stares.

The boy smiles.

And the more he stares at the boy in mirror, the more that genuine, happy smile looks like a grin.

Smiling…to grinning…to _laughing_…to **smirking**…**_mocking_**…

Mocking him because _he_ **_has_** the one thing that Draco Malfoy wants more than anything else.

"Stop staring at me! 

"Don't you _dare_ laugh at me like that! 

"Stop it!!

**__**

"Stop it!!"

Erised says nothing.

If she had tears, she would cry; oh, she would.

And she still says nothing, as Draco curls up on his side on the dungeon floor, on the cold flagstones-

Squeezing his eyes shut-

And she says nothing.

***

It is morning.

She can sense it.

And Draco has not left the dungeon…he's asleep, on the cold floor.

Still curled up, hands balled up fiercely over his eyes…

Refusing to see-

Refusing to believe.

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'All of them refused to believe…'

The door of the dungeon is flung open.

Two men stand there; one she recognises as Albus Dumbledore, and the other is one who fits Draco's description of a man known as Professor Snape.

The man in dark robes strides purposefully towards Draco, picks him with a gentleness that belies his stern expression, and prepares to leave the dungeon. Dumbledore follows close behind him.

And then while Snape carries him away, the boy wakes.

His head turns, eyes focusing blearily on the mirror-

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"NO!!"

He starts to struggle-

"Put me down! _Put me down!_

"Father, don't let them take me-

"Make him **REAL**!!

"Erised, don't let them take me away!

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"Father!!"

His voice ascends into a hoarse scream as he manages to writhe out of Snape's grasp, sending himself crashing to the stone floor.

He scrambles, crawls over to the mirror-

Fingers brush the glass-

"Erised, please…"

Dumbledore steps forward, wand pointing at the boy.

"Obliviate," he whispers.

And he slumps forward onto the cold flagstones.

Snape comes forward again, glances at the Headmaster, and then gives a sigh halfway between exasperation and sympathy as he lifts the boy again.

"Take him to the Hospital Wing," Dumbledore says. "When he wakes…tell him-"

"I'll take care of it," Snape says.

Dumbledore nods and the two leave.

Silence.

"It has been a long time since we last met, Erised."

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'Indeed, Dumbledore.'

"Why did the boy come here?"

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'He said that he had stumbled upon this place. When he was restless one night. How did you know to look for him?'

"His bed was empty this morning. And after his housemates realised that he'd been missing for two hours, they let Professor Snape know, during their Potions class. We've been searching the whole school, until Professor Snape suggested the one place that we had not thought to look yet."

He waved an arm at their surroundings.

"The dungeons."

Silence.

"What did he want?"

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'His father…he wanted me to bring the image that he saw to life.'

"I see." The old wizard sighed. "You do know…that he will not be coming back to visit you anymore?"

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'Yes. It is also for his own good.'

Silence.

"I am sorry about this, Erised…"

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'No. It is not your doing. I was simply made in this way.'

He walks towards the door.

"Perhaps I shall have to add Wards and other charms to this door." A pause. "Farewell, Erised."

The door closes.

***

I have heard that in the Muggle world, mirrors do not speak.

They do not speak or live or feel as we in the Wizarding world do.

And I often wonder at what a release it would be.

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To not be able to feel…

I couldn't give Draco what he wanted.

And as selfish as it sounds, if I had been able to, I wouldn't have given him the father that he desired.

After all…if I had given him that, he would have no reason to see me anymore.

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To not be able to feel…

Feel no guilt at luring these people back to me-

So that I may have company-

While they drive themselves to madness…

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To not be able to feel…

If I could not feel, I would not have this…desire…for companionship…

The irony.

The mirror of Desire has desires too.

End


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